I'm a stubborn ass. I'll admit it and I'll own up to it. The more people say, "Yeah, I give you 3 days without Facebook" the more I don't want to get back on. Tell me I can't do something and I'll break my back proving you wrong. The more I succumb to my own thoughts the more I prove that stupid prodding thought wrong. As insignificant as it is.
I gave up soda. That might seem like a very silly accomplishment to be proud of and if that's the case we are clearly not as close as you'd like to believe. I'm the person who wakes up and reaches for a Diet Coke. I hop in my car with my keys, cell phone, wallet and a Diet Coke. I sip soda throughout my shift at work without blinking. And so one day... I decided I wasn't going to do that anymore. More of a personal challenge than anything. And then people told me I couldn't do it. And here we are. I imagine this is a less extreme version of what smokers feel like when they kick the habit.
I also gave up Facebook for awhile. I was tired of my relationships relying on the Internet. What happened to people calling or texting to ask how you are? Why do you have to ask to hang out with me on Facebook? I'm guilty of the previous grievances as well and that's why I stopped. It was so nice tonight to talk to a friend and get immediate responses and feel like we were actually speaking rather than having a conversation the whole world could see. It's more intimate and I miss that. I miss the privacy of being able to say whatever I wanted to a friend. I was also tired of everything being about Facebook. "Well, I wrote on your wall." "I invited you to the event!" "Did you see the picture I tagged?" I miss getting emails with pictures. I miss getting a phone call to hang out. Like I said, I'm guilty of all of that. And I will admit... it's convenient. But this is my experiment to let myself know that there is a life outside of Facebook. That my relationships can absolutely rely on the telephone and face-to-face interaction. This is all coming from the self-proclaimed Facebook addict. I'll admit it and I'm sure everyone will agree. I'm fine with that. However, once again, the more people tell me I can't do it... the less I want to go back. What was the point anyway? To share my picture? To keep in touch with the people who wrote on my wall on my birthday because Facebook told them so?
Most of the people that wrote on my wall I already talked to on a semi-regular basis. Why did I need Facebook as another medium to talk to them? We already talked enough as it was. I will say that I do miss seeing what others were up to. People who I used to be close with but am not anymore because life has taken us in different directions. Those are the reasons I will get back on Facebook. To see wedding pictures of the friends whose wedding I can't attend. To see my friends' kids grow up. Facebook, I'll hand it to you... you've got me by the balls on those aspects. Touche. So I'll go back eventually. But for now... I need a break. I'm still trying to figure out what my motivation should be to reactivate my account...
But... I'm stubborn.
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